Today

People are arriving. I think Bran and her friends just pulled in.

Taben and Aiden got back a little while ago. I feel so blank and empty right now. So uncertain. I am uncertain. I don't know what to do or how to take this all right now. I just want to break down and cry. I just don't know what I want. I don't want to be alone but I feel alone. I want someone to just hold me and let me cry and tell me it'll be alright. It's going to be alright, isn't it? It's gotta be. I've got Aiden and Brennon and Dean. They're all here.

I've applied for my name change. I'm taking my mother's name. Samantha Candice. I miss mom. I miss dad too, but I miss mom most. I could talk to her and she understood my problems. I don't have anyone that understands girl things now. Well I have Bran I guess. I don't know though. I don't want to be a pest to her.

No one ever survives a stalking from the Slender Man. I've read up on that stuff. I know that's how it works. Why does everyone think we'll make it? How can we make it when the odds are against us? I'm so scared. I don't even know what to do.

I'd better go. Lunch is ready. Small lunch then we wait for Brennon's family to get here. Then we can get this over with. I want today to be done. Tomorrow after everyone leaves we're going to go buy trees in mom and dad's memory to plant. Though I've been talking to them and trying to convince them about maybe some fruit bushes. blueberries or blackberries. Mom and dad loves them and they loved the pies they could make with them as well. Every harvest we could make pies and give them some on our alters as an offering and blessing to them.

I'll have to run that by Brennon and Aiden. I like that idea. I like baking. Maybe Taben can help me with stuff. I just hope he doesn't feel insulted about it. He's a good guy, he really is. I really enjoy his company. Maybe we can go out and do stuff like my mom and I used to do.

I better go. I'm turning into a depressing rambling teenager, and we all know what people seem to think of such beings.